For us, this definitely is not a 5 star hotel - it has a pretentiousness about it that portrays it as such, with rules and terms and conditions everywhere, but there is a real lack of friendliness, almost as if you're staying there on THEIR terms, and not as a paying guest. There is a 2 tier system (Club Lounge level that we didn't see but suggested you'd get 5 star service/quality - and everyone else which is definitely not 5 star, more like 3 at best) This is only because it has the roof terrace that it has portrayed itself as an elite destination and is not living up to it's own hype. Some of the behaviour and activities we saw were frankly bizarre. The few staff members we came across seemed disorganised, disinterested, and many spoke very little English. Everywhere we went we were asked to fill in feedback forms, and we realised that this is probably used by the management, but not necessarily in a good way towards their teams. So, onto the actual issues with the stay. 1. Check in - the man who checked us in sat next to me and kept watching as I put in my PIN no for the credit card pre-authorisation. When I tried to move the machine slightly out of his line of sight, he followed/leant in to see. He then spent an inordinate amount of time checking my credit card against the paperwork. This caused me significant concerns about potential fraud risk. I was sufficiently alarmed to have to ring my credit card company and arrange to change the PIN immediately to limit/ reduce the risk. 2. The check in man just gave us our room card and didn't tell us where to go - he just walked off. The hotel is huge and has several banks of lifts which only go to certain floors (which we didn't know). We ended up going to the wrong bank of lifts, had no idea where to go/where anything was, and ended up back in reception again where a lady (no idea what her actual name/role was) had to show us to our room. A small point, but again, just a sign of the lack of interest in us as guests. We literally never saw the chap that checked us in again during our stay. 3. In order for my PIN change to become effective, I needed to push a transaction through the card, so we went to the Saffron bar for a coffee . My Husband was literally looked up and down before being allowed in for a coffee (this was 6pm ish and we'd just arrived from another island so had been travelling all day - he was wearing suitable clothes and sandals - we would normally have changed, but the urgency to get my PIN changed over-rode us having time to do that). The same thing happened again with the card - when I tried to pay by card, the hotel tried to take my card and watch me put in the PIN. When I said no, and physically turned the card machine away from him, he tried to turn the machine so he could see the key pad. This behaviour is truly alarming. 4. Our room had a really strange smell when you entered. We believe now it was damp as the air con/extractor in the bathroom was not working so that room was roasting hot and humid. Initially I thought it was a signature smell of the hotel (as it had a really odd sweet smell) but it got more and more pronounced when you entered, to the point that it made me feel a little sick. 5. We saw dehumidifiers in the hallway on our floor so it suggests there is a problem with damp in the hotel. The more you looked in the room, the more you saw how tired/run down the rooms were. 6. Communication in the hotel was actually dreadful - several times we were told the wrong thing (eg to get a coffee / snack on arrival as we hadn't eaten since breakfast, check in man told us to go to the main restaurant, which we did, to be told it was closed) - this sort of thing happened frequently) . The evening meal was probably the worst we've eaten in Thailand, and the price one of the most expensive. It was chaotic. 7. Really strong smell yesterday morning of marijuana being smoked around the goodies cafe, the smell followed all the way from the cafe back to the hotel reception. Just to be clear, this isn't pointed at the cafe, we think this may have been guests/visitors in the area but it was really strong. 8. Dress Code inconsistencies - the hotel seems to have a real issue with men wearing sandals, even good dress sandals, and portray a dress code, which we respect, but to literally be scrutinised on your appearance to be deemed worthy to eat in their Vertigo/VertigoToo restaurants, then to see others sitting there with very relaxed dress (such as swim shorts at dinner) is very confusing. This was observed several times, and my husband was literally checked out before being allowed in places! 9. Breakfast - the buffet food was dreadful, food wasn't covered up, and whilst some fresh food is being cooked, mostly it is just self-serve buffet which is open to people to handle. The pastries are bought in and re-heated - you can tell this as the actual pastries made by the hotel are sold in their coffee shop (Goodies) which is run by students and far exceeds the quality of what you get offered at breakfast. The coffee was out of an instant machine. The restaurant F&B manager seems to walk around, but the rest of the team speak very limited English and refuse to make eye contact, so trying to get their attention to order a tea/coffee was impossible. When we asked for a new pot of tea, it took 3 people who took the pot away and just brought back the same pot with the old teabags in it topped up with water. We gave up in the end. We realised that whilst the team are there, they are literally there to lay tables and clear tables and clearly have no way of knowing how to deal with requests for more tea/coffee/general breakfast requests - they seem petrified when someone asks them a question and behave in an odd robotic manner. When we finally got a coffee, it was literally dumped on the table and they walked off. This can only be down to the hotel - surely if you are putting people in a position where guests might ask for something, help them to know what to do/answer those questions/be friendly. 10. Evening Meal - Vertigo Too. Probably the most expensive meal we've eaten in Thailand and one of the worst experiences/quality. It actually became so farcical we felt like we were in an episode of Fawlty Towers crossed with Mission Impossible! We had a reservation for the Moon Bar and Vertigo for dinner on both nights (pre-booked before we arrived) We arrived on the 59th floor and only found out the rooftop was closed by a sign when we exited the lift. We asked the lady at Vertigo Too where do we now go for dinner if our reservation has been cancelled (we hadn't been informed of the closure), and were told to go back to Reception. We trundled back down to the lobby to be told we should have been moved to the Vertigo Too restaurant when the top floor was closed (where we'd just been sent away from) - so we went back to the 59th Floor to try again. A couple in front of us were offered a table immediately, and when we said we need a table, we were told it's too busy/full. Again, my husband was visually scrutinised for what he was wearing (dress shirt, trousers, leather dress sandals (mostly covered)). # There were stern looking security guards everywhere looking like FBI agents, talking into ear pieces and literally acting like stern bouncers at the staircase to the top floor (almost blocking you going up the stairs to the bathrooms) and all through the restaurant. All v strange - we actually thought maybe there was a presidential visit we didn't know about. When I explained again we had a reservation that was cancelled, someone finally found our reservation and allowed us into Vertigo Too. It wasn't full - around 50% capacity - still no idea why they seemed to want to turn us away. The restaurant is very cool/funky, but that's where the good bit ends. We were sat with 2 others couples either side of us and all 3 tables had issues with their meals. From our initial seating, it then took 45 mins to be able to order drinks and food. It all got very confusing due to language barriers, and whilst we have complete tolerance/understanding (we love learning and engaging with Thai people), this just added another layer of chaos and confusion. There are no menu's, everything has to be done through their QR code, so in a dark restaurant, all you can see are a sea of blue faces as people are forced onto their phones to look/pick their food and drinks. When we finally managed to order, starters took 45 mins, mains over an hour after the starters, every single course had no cutlery and we had to wait 10 mins at a time to get someone's attention to ask for cutlery. There was a actually a sharp piece of plastic in my chicken caesar salad starter (I thought it was a fish bone, but it was actually plastic) but I let it go as my husbands starter was nice (and we probably wouldn't have been able to say anything anyway due to the language barrier). The mains (at over £45 each) were utterly dreadful. They arrived under a cloche, and the server actually counted 1, 2, 3 then lifted them with a 'ta da!' - almost to show off how good the dish was for the price. What we actually had was overcooked pork chop and cold sauce with some sad looking vegetables, my poisson was actually served upside down (so the chicken's bum was in my face!) as it had been so poorly prepared, yet served anyway. My serving dish it was in was freezing cold, so my meal was truly awful. The couple to our right had a set menu, and when asked how was the meal, the waiter was told the meat was over-cooked, to which he said thank you and just walked away with no recognition of the feedback. The chap to our left was in the restaurant in what looked like swimming shorts. He'd ordered a lobster, which they proceeded to come back and tell him the special was sold, but they could offer him another lobster dish. They brought out a lobster trailing water all over the floor to show the man that the lobster was fresh - it became a heated debate as the staff were literally wiggling the legs of the lobster trying to convince the customer it was still alive - he actually said, you can wiggle it's legs all you want - that lobster is clearly dead!. I can't actually believe I'm writing this - it was hysterical. He ended up having to re-choose his main course 3 times as they ran out of whatever he ordered (and he didn't want the last poor lobster) Staff in the restaurant - and there were many of them - were either on their personal phones hiding under counters, wouldn't make eye contact to serve customers, or stood there with their arms folded looking out the window. They seemed chaotic and confused, whilst also walking around avoiding eye contact - a truly strange combination and you really had to see it to believe it. When we finally got our £160 bill for 2 courses, 3 beers (one of which we didn't actually order) and a bottle of water - suffice to say it wasn't quite so funny. Finally, one positive point - the Goodies coffee shop, owned by the hotel (although seems to serve mainly office staff, not guests), but run by a student teacher / with students to give them experience, was superb. The team there were absolutely lovely and we were genuinely delighted to spend a little money in there - we told them their food / service was the best in the whole hotel. It's clear that what is served in the main restaurant is NOT the same as the pastries made by the hotel for sale. If you are a Lounge member, you may see better, but as regular guests, this hotel is a poor 3 star. I've stayed in better Holiday Inn's. So to summarise, the Banyan Tree falls way way below it's image as a 5 star experience for all guests - indeed the impression given is that you must conform to their standards. They have a very long way to go to even nearly hope to match the standards of the Anantara Siam nearby (which blows this place out of the park) and is undeserving of the rating it's given itself. Everything about it was distinctly 'un Thai' and we didn't see a single glimmer of the wonderful Thai culture we would normally expect. My complaints are not with the staff at all, as we know how wonderful the Thai people are - it is with the management, believing this kind of service/quality/lack of training to be acceptable for the prices they are charging. We've probably stayed at upwards of 15 5 star hotels/resorts in Thailand over the years - this was the absolute worst by a long way. We didn't raise these issues with the hotel as trip advisor reviews show recently where people have complained about similar appear to have had worrying experiences with the hotel (mentions of being locked in rooms and passports confiscated) and that made us suitably concerned/unsafe that we couldn't say anything at the time, so we just wanted to leave.
4.6/5 (1201 reviews) 
4.2/5 (1443 reviews) 
